Is my team bad? I am coming to grips with the fact that it might need a tune up. My team lost a lot of pop when ONiel Cruz went down, and since then the shortstop position has been a turnstile disaster for me.

I want to point to Thursday. My team started off going 0 for 16 and ended up going 3 for 19. That same say DiMaio’s team went 12 for 35. That there is a nine hit difference, and I lost by ten. Feel free to compare the days because I can’t stop thinking about it.

I am currently riding a three game losing streak heading into a battle with my cousin. Need to turn it around.

WEEK FOUR: April 24 – April 30

Fuck me man. I had my best hitting week of the year and it was for nought because DiMaio is just an animal with his offensive line up. DiMaio had five players get seven or more hits; Bryan Reynolds, Yandy Diaz, Salvador Perez, Bo Bichette and Shohei Ohtani were weapons in the batter’s box. These five guys bailed out Kyle Schwarber who went 3 for 18, and Alex Bregman who was 3 for 20. Paul Goldschmidt was a monster for me going 11 for 29. Alex Verdugo and Cedric Mullins also stepped up with seven hits a piece. My rotation at short stop since Tim Anderson got hurt went 2 for 20; thank you Enrique Hernandez and Mauricio Dubon.

DiMaio tied for the best week with runs scored so nothing I say here is going to change the fact I was swimming upstream the entire time. The leader in runs scored this season was led by Bo Bichette and his five runs scored. Yandy Diaz and Bryan Reynolds each scored four times. Five other players scored three runs. Of all the hitters that DiMaio played in his lineup, the only one to not score a run was Jorge Polanco. I was led by Verdugo and Mullins, each of whom scored four runs. I had six other plays score three times, but just didn’t get the same depth after that.

Yet another category that DiMaio took from me on the last day. Nathaniel Lowe, Ohtani and Bichette all homered on Sunday and my one home run from Alex Verdugo was not enough. DiMaio continued on his sweep of the hitting categories taking this one, 10-9. The only two players of mine to hit multiple dingers were Goldschmidt and Ozzie Albies. A duo went twofer for DiMaio too; Bichette and Ohtani.

If you get less than 30 RBI in a week then you deserve to lose the category. That is my take. With that being said, I don’t think I have a shot in this category with the way my roster is currently constructed. Verdugo and Mullins continued to lead my way with their productivity with six runs batted in a piece. Goldschmidt and Albies had five each. Three different players on DiMaio had half a dozen RBIs; Nico Hoerner from the Cubs made his presence known, and Salvador Perez continued his ageless hitting technique while Bichette just continues to flow well like his hair.

One man beat me in this category. Ohtani had four steals during the week, and I only had three as a squad. I’d like to thank Mullins for swiping two bags and Goldschmidt even stole one, but it wasn’t worth anything. Ohtani, a one man wrecking crew, stealing any chance I have at winning.

At this point I am lying on the ground playing dead because I am getting beaten to an absolute pulp. I am not taking home a single hitting category. My team is in a slump. But can they be when they are getting on base at a clip of .3386? That is above average. I looked it up. The average is .320 for on base percentage. I had a midweek pickup in Mauricio Dubon and that didn’t pan out; he went 1 for 11 and had a .167 on base clip. Perez had on base percentage of .500 with nine hits and two walks. Even Schwarber managed a .375 OBP despite hitting 3 for 18.

I will take any category that I can get. Right now, this is the only category I can get. I tied for the second most strikeouts of the week. I needed all of it to get by DiMaio because he was just three shy of myself. I had a pair of pitchers record 13 strikeouts over the week. Jordan Montgomery did it over two starts and 12.2 innings. Over a K/9, so not too bad. Then there is Kevin Gausman, and this guy is simply dealing. He had 13 strikeouts over seven innings allowing only one walk. Gausman is a fucking weapon. The only double-digit strikeout thrower for DiMaio was Cobb; he had 11 Ks over two starts and 14.0 innings.

Christopher Allen Sale. Why do you have to do this to me? How? Why? I had Sale with me for the start of the week against Baltimore and he went five innings allowing five earned runs with no strikeouts. He did not record the win. DiMaio added him to the roster and played him on Sunday, and Sale got the win against the Guardians going 6.1 innings surrendering just three hits and one earned run. His win on Sunday tied this category for me. Would have really helped the margin of defeat for me.

In positive news, I think I like my reliever situation now. Jose Alvarado of Philadelphia and Camilo Doval of San Francisco are getting the save opportunities which is really all you can hope for. Sure Doval blew a save that could have gotten me a category win, but I am doing silver lining here. DiMaio has a bit of a good luck stick up his ass because he got two saves on Sunday from Jhoan Duran and Ryan Pressly.

Here it is, the one category that I felt supremely comfortable with heading into Sunday. All of my starters had pitched by Sunday so only my relievers could be ERA bombers and they couldn’t ruin what I had. My team put forth a 1.845 ERA, best of the league for the week. I needed all I could muster too because DiMaio had the third best ERA of the week at 3.316.

I had a damn good WHIP. A 1.043 WHIP is damn good. However, it is not a good as 0.947. DiMaio had the best WHIP of the week, and that is exceptionally infuriating to look at on my spreadsheet. Despite Mason Miller having a 9.00 ERA for Mike, Miller’s WHIP was only 1.5. Ohtani somehow had a 7.50 ERA but a 0.83 WHIP. Just bamboozles the mind. I am confused by it. Some could say I am envious. My WHIP was murdered by Chris Sale, who had a 2.0 WHIP in his start against the Orioles. In his start against the Guardians, it was 0.47.

This is going to be an outside the box MVP, but I am going to go with Alex Cobb. This man pitched 14.0 innings and had three earned runs for a 1.93 ERA. This included a start in Mexico City, which is basically like the moon. He allowed only three earned runs in that game and had seven strikeouts. And in his first game he threw a complete game! With ZERO earned runs!

It was a fairly dominating week for DiMaio, so I will just have to give his LVP to Jacob deGrom. You guessed it. He is on the IL again. High round draft pick may have been wasted by DiMaio but his team still mashes.

Going to go with Paul Goldschmidt as my MVP in my losing effort. Let me team with a .419 OBP, and had a pair of home runs. He even chipped in a stolen base, which he should never be relied up for. I almost wanted to give it to Jordan Montgomery for pitching 12.2 innings with a 0.71 ERA. Couldn’t pull the trigger with Kevin Gausman matching his strikeout total in one outing.

Chris Sale. You betrayed me. You know what you did. How could you? (But thank you for pitching great and taking the series from the Guardians.)

MVP TRACKER: Goldschmidt (1), Mullins (2), Verdugo (1)
LVP TRACKER: Casas (1), Soto (1), Sale (1), St. Louis Cardinals (1)


  • DiMaio and I were close up until the weekend. He helped beat me as badly as he did using Chris Sale (who was on my roster earlier in the week), and Alex Cobb (who was on my roster earlier this season). DiMaio continued to dominate the hitting categories, and sneaking in a win and a save on the last day to tie this categories really fucked me up.
  • Eric almost got Vaghi! Almost! Drama on the last day with ties in runs and saves. Neither had strong pitching weeks in terms of ERA. Eric has to be fuming at Marco Gonzales who had a 15.00 ERA on Sunday with five earned runs in three innings.
  • Bove! From the clouds! After a fairly disastrous hitting week last week, he comes home with 63 hits! Talk about two different styles too. Michaud hits boppers but Bove gets base knocks. Michaud needs to worry about his pitching. 5.772 ERA is absolutely nuts.
  • Michael Kenney loves to hit. He doesn’t love to pitch. Billy, not the best week for your team to go ice cold. Only 13 RBI over the course of seven days is almost unheard of. A .2578 OBP is also very, very low. Michael Kenney could just add together the RBIs of Rafael Devers and C.J. Cron and he would have 12 RBI.
  • Andrew Huntley sweeps the hitting categories due in large part to the final day. He had 11 hits on Sunday and Jack only had four; the margin was two. List captured the saves category on the last day with a save. The WHIP and ERA was close, and Huntley could have had even more dominant if he didn’t have three pitchers with over a 10.00 ERA.


  • Bill set five new lows this week: 41 hits, 21 runs, 13 runs batted in, 3 home runs and .2578 on base percentage.
    • For the record, he tied himself and myself for worst week in home runs, matching week two
  • Michaud sent worst week for steals with one stolen base.
  • If you are counting, new low marks were set in every hitting category this week.
  • Michaud set a new low (or high actually) with a 5.772 ERA.
  • The five winners this week were the top five hitting teams.
  • I am going to write about myself; I finished top half in eight categories. I lost my matchup by the largest margin. The cruelty of fantasy sports.
  • Jack and Kenney have cemented themselves as the best, and worst, at the saves categories.
  • The only category where there more losers in the top half of the category was wins. Granted there was there four people tied with four wins. The two winners in the category with five wins from their pitchers both lost their respective week; sorry Bill and Eric.


  • We have a family affair with Michael and I squaring up against one another. I am going to be in big need of some magic because I don’t see myself having a chance.
    • According to the stats, Michael Kenney should win this matchup 6-4-1. He owns all the advantages in the hitting categories, so god help me.
  • DiMaio is coming off the most dominant win over last week and Vaghi has seen his average margin of matchup victory diminish over the last two weeks.
    • According to the stats, DiMaio is projected to win this matchup, 6-5. DiMaio holds the edge in the hitting categories while Vaghi holds the edge in all the pitching categories.
  • Michaud needs a win. He and I are struggling the most, but I never had the peak that Michaud had.
    • According to the stats, Eric should win this matchup, 6-5. Split in various different categories.
  • Kind of wanted this to be a matchup of winless teams heading into this week, but both Bove and Huntley earned their first victories last week. Now they do battle.
    • According to the stats, Huntley should pick up his second straight win having the edge in categories, 8-3.
  • List is just taking care of business and kinda doing it slowly and steadily. Billy’s team had the worst hitting work of the entire season in week four so get in the cages otherwise it’ll be List tossing a Shutpiece.
    • According to the stats, this should be the most lopsided matchup of the week. List is projected to win, 9-2.


  • The top three in the standings remain the same: Vaghi, List and Kenney sit on the podium spots.
  • Michael DiMaio movie sup from eighth to fourth, and I drop from fourth the eighth. The symmetry there is real seeing how we played each other and the result was rather decisive.
  • Billy Drakeley shifts down to sixth place and Eric moves up to fifth. Just a little switcheroo there.
  • Andrew Huntley moves up from ninth place to seventh with his first win of the season.
  • Michaud, who was in the playoff picture as of a couple weeks ago, now sits its ninth place. He took the shellacking from Vaghi and is still licking his wounds.
  • Bove remains in last place, but he will take a win and run with it. Momentum.
  • With my three game losing streak, I am no longer part of the playoff bracket and that is suitable. Don’t deserve to get in there right now.
  • The first time this year that DiMaio has seen himself in the projected playoff bracket. Happy to help!
  • Besides DiMaio entering the fold and me leaving it, there is no change in terms of the participants. Kenney and List are still in the two-three matchup, and Vaghi remains the top dog.

  • Vaghi – Strikeouts, Earned Run Average, Walk/Hits Per Inning (3)
  • DiMaio – Hits, Runs (2)
  • List – On Base Percentage, Saves (2)
  • Michaud – Home Runs, Runs Batted In (2)
  • Eric – Wins (1)
  • Kenney – Steals (1)

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