QUICK THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE

  • The good thing about this episode is that Jenn finally great a set of balls and got angry at the men. Aaron, of course, set the whole thing in motion before leaving (which was the right decision), so thank you to that pearl-wearing flying man for making sure he stirred the pot one last time. It is bonkers how Aaron went from being absolute asshole in week two, to potential American hero trying to make a tough decision in week three. But I digress. This week also brought us the extremely awkward sexual dancing which made me want to crawl into a hole. Jeremy somehow did something and got a rose, and Sam managed to piss off all of America with the way he acted. Week three was better than week two…I think? Jenn finally became a person and got tired of all the shit. That bodes well for the rest of the show.

(MY) POWER RANKINGS

No. 12
Sam M.

(Last Week 4)
(Average Rank 5.67)

I was totally wrong. I thought this guy was okay after week one…salvageable after week two…but he is a fucking tool following week three. All he does is talk with his tongue in Jenn’s mouth, which means they have no real connection. He is an arrogant son of a bitch.

No. 11
John

(Last Week 15)
(Average Rank 12.67)

I still know absolutely nothing about this man. Have we heard him talk about anything substantive? Have I just missed all of him the entire show this far? I feel like John is just coasting, which for him is good but for the viewer is boring as fuck.

No. 10
Sam N.

(Last Week 11)
(Average Rank 11.67)

This dude is so fucking annoying. He creates his own problems. All he does is whine. He hurts himself all the time. How the fuck is he still around? Producer infringement to the umpteenth degree. To make matters worse, he has no chemistry with the lead.

No. 9
Thomas N.

(Last Week 13)
(Average Rank 12)

The king of inserting himself into the conversation did not have as big an imprint in week three. With that being said, his bromance with Sam is troubling.

No. 8
Dylan

(Last Week 8)
(Average Rank 9)

The man is big and sexy. However, the man is empty when it comes to substance. We know that he wants to be a medical student; he has won some extra time before, but episode three was filled with vacant experiences.

No. 7
Jeremy

(Last Week 12)
(Average Rank 11.33)

Jeremy is quiet now, so perhaps my hatred should lessen. He won a group date rose, which is SHOCKING. Still think he has absolutely no shot at making it far.

No. 6
Austin

(Last Week 10)
(Average Rank 11.33)

The more we get of Austin, the more I like him. He says things short and concisely. The mullet is not distracting at all. Kinda knew he was safe on the small group date when Hakeem and Jeremy were on it.

No. 5
Grant

(Last Week 3)
(Average Rank 4.33)

I did not like how I was nervous for Grant during the rose ceremony. We didn’t get a ton of him in the episode which means he stayed above the fray…but don’t forget to be a part of the play Grant!

No. 4
Spencer

(Last Week 9)
(Average Rank 8.33)

The man gets the one-on-one date and does a solid job with it. He has been engaged before and had it broken off. Spencer’s crowning moment came at the cocktail party when he pointed out how the fighting is about “what” exactly?

No. 3
Devin

(Last Week 7)
(Average Rank 5.67)

Like him or not, Devin came out on top this week. Sam looks like a total dunce, and Devin did absolutely kill the stripping group date with his confidence. The man is who he is, and some have come to accept, and others want to murder him.

No. 2
Jonathon

(Last Week 2)
(Average Week 4.33)

The man got a rose. The man looked good. Jonathon again does no wrong. East sailing.

No. 1
Marcus

(Last Week 1)
(Average Rank 1.33)

It speaks volumes that after Jenn actually got angry (rightfully), she chose Marcus to talk to. He calmed her down, and she knew that he would. That tells a ton about the man.

We said goodbye to Hakeem and Tomas A. this week. Hakeem will be on Paradise, of that I have absolutely no doubt. Tomas A. is a very good-looking man, but his mouth didn’t do much talking. Looks can only get you so far, I guess. Someone should tell Sam that.

The Bachelorette airs on Monday nights on ABC, beginning at 8 PM EST.

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