PREAMBLE

If I can bestow one piece of advice on this random November Tuesday, it would be to not write something that involves multiple different reference points while also trying to rewatch David Fincher’s Mank. I will readily admit that my brain is frazzled and torn to pieces trying to keep up with the dialogue while also trying to sort out who ranks where after this week of fantasy football. I will admit, it isn’t smart at all. So pardon my typos, but I gotta finish all these Fincher movies within the week.

Not a ton of high scoring scores this week, but the margin on three of the matchups were pretty close. Steve improves to 8-1 which is nutso, and McGinnity suffers a loss but stays in second place. Now the four teams that are currently in the playoff projected bracket are all above .500, but there are four teams that are currently at 4-5 biting on T-Si’s and Ronan’s heels. 

Let’s get going.

WEEK 9 SCOREBOARD

  • I am not going to say that I’m back. But I also am not saying that I am not not back. You see what I am saying? Back-to-back weeks I have the honor of being the top scoring week, and a team that lost six games in a row is now clawing its way into the distant playoff picture. It is fucking massive that Rachaad White woke up this week for a season-best 25.9 points, and Josh Jacobs also had his second 20+ scoring output of the season.
    • Lobo’s team score was handicapped by sub par weeks from Jaylen Waddle and Cooper Kupp. Kupp now has now scored double-digit points since week six; he has less than 20 combined points over the last three weeks. Waddle got banged up in Germany and had his fourth single-digit scoring game. Cole Kmet and Gus Edwards did their best to lift Lobo’s boat, but the Giants defense really sunk any chance for a Monday night miracle with Breece Hall.
  • Ronan improves to 5-4 on the season due in large part to the stack of Dak Prescott and CeeDee Lamb. Despite losing the game, the pair combined for 50.96 points. D’Andre Swift has been kept in check two of the past three weeks. Chris Godwin was garbage and Travis Kelce continues his pericious decline to…normality? But who cares, A win is a win. Ronan is deep in the stew of playoff contenders.
    • The Baltimore Ravens are very good, and Lamar Jackson doesn’t need to be great for that to happen. The potential MVP only had 11.48 points for Tommy. DJ Moore, Romeo Dobbs, and Trey McBride combined for 12.7 points. Also Harrison Butker had only three points kicking overseas. Tommy’s team just didn’t score a lot this week, and that is okay. Better times are ahead, we hope.
  • If this matchup didn’t have a Monday night competitor, then it would have been a very close contest. However, Garrett Wilson plays for the New York Gets and that means that Steve is going to get another victory which is a bit wider than it should have been. Jalen Hurts was great, even gimpy with injury. Derrick Henry and Alexander Mattison combined for 33.9 points. I should not stop bashing Mattison. Mark Andrews had double-figures, as did DeVonta Smith.
    • Josh Allen did his part, but this seems to be a theme for Buzzi. Allen is one of the best fantasy QBs of the season, but the rest of his roster is not breaking the mold. Tony Pollard is averaging less than 12 rushes per game. Tyreek Hill, DeAndre Hopkins, Terry McLaurin, James Cook and Pollard all scored single-digits. Struggle city. Was a bad omen when George Pickens scored *let me count*  0.9 points. 
  • Jimmy! A victory! We love to see it! Running backs may still be an issue for the young man, but Stefon Diggs, Tee Higgins and Jakobi Myers all scored touchdowns from the wide receiver position. And Jimmy won with a goose egg from Gabe Davis. With Ja’Marr Chase being hurt and likely out at least next week, it is more time for Tee Higgins to get as the team’s number one, and that is a sexy thought seeing how well Joe Burrow is playing.
    • This is the second time this season that McGinnity scored less than 100 points with the other being in week five which was a loss to Tommy. This time around it was just a waving of the white flag. Having Christian McCaffrey and Amon-Ra St. Brown on a bye is going to impact your scoring. I am assuming that Matt didn’t expect Michael Thomas, Zay Flowers and DK Metcalf to only combine for 7.1 points however.
  • A miracle has occurred! Diontae Johson scored a touchdown! Holy lord! 16.5 points on thursday Night was a great start. The happiness for Johnson’s springing from scoring prison is traded for the sorrow of Bijan Robinson being pinned in chains. Why the fuck did Tyler Algier get more touches than Robinson? Ritz’s MVP is the Cleveland Browns D/ST, who scored 23 points against the Cardinals inept offense. Much better than the -4.0 defense in McLaughlin’s starting lineup.
    • Mr. McLaughlin did put his nuts on the table but they got smashed by Ritz and his makeshift roster of “whatever I can get” roster. Patrick Mahomes is outscored by Taysom Hill, which has been a theme of late. What if I told you Hill has scored 40.58 points over the last two weeks, and Mahomes has 21.4. Alvin Kamara had his first single-digit outing since his unveiling after suspension. Baker Mayfield also has 40.38 points over two weeks…but no one would sit Mahomes.

WEEK 9 ANALYTICS

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  • Two teams outside the top five in scoring won this week.
    • Congrats to Ritz and Jimmy on the big wins.
  • I was the only team to score above my projected point total. My team scored +47.00…which is nuts. Next closest was Lobo at -0.46 points compared to projected.
  • McGinnity finished last in seven categories this week. We all have those weeks.
  • Three different teams this week had their top player actually be a defensive/special teams; the Los Angeles Rams, the Cleveland Browns and the Baltimore Ravens.

ADDITIONAL WEEK 9 STATISTICS

AVERAGE MARGIN OF VICTORY BY WEEK
  • Week 1: 19.13
  • Week 2: 25.52
  • Week 3: 21.73
  • Week 4: 30.65
  • Week 5: 31.73
  • Week 6: 18.64
  • Week 7 : 31.32
  • Week 8: 19.57
  • Week 9: 22.39
  • Average Margin Of Victory This Season Is 24.52
TOP FIVE WEEKLY TOTAL
  • 153.50 – Stanko
  • 126.26 – Ronan
  • 113.88 – Kultzow
  • 113.44 – Lobo
  • 109.18 – T-Si
LOWEST FIVE WEEKLY TOTAL
  • 108.32 – Ritz
  • 103.12 – Buzzi
  • 97.72 – Jimmy
  • 94.52 – McLaughlin
  • 67.44 – McGinnity
AVERAGE TEAM TOTALS PER WEEK
  • Week One: 106.91
  • Week Two: 114.35
  • Week Three: 125.07
  • Week Four: 118.43
  • Week Five: 119.13
  • Week 6: 113.31
  • Week 7 : 110.73
  • Week 8: 120.69
  • Week 9: 108.79
  • Average Team Total This Season Is 115.27

WEEK 10 MATCHUPS

  • Tommy Simon is coming off a loss to Ronan, and I am coming off a second straight win. The clogged toilet bowl that was my season at the start has begun to clear itself out, but I am going up against a foe who is in desperate need of a win. Sam LaPorta will be welcomed back, but can he replace A.J. Brown, who is on a bye?
    • Tommy and I opened up the season and I came away with a 102.14 win. This is back when I had Austin Ekeler, Chris Olave, Tyler Higbee and Brandin Cooks. And T-Si had Aaron Jones as a workhorse and Lamar Jackson scored single-digits. Lot has changed since week one. Tommy had three Packers in his starting lineup, and that may not be the case again.
  • Jimmy Simon, how does it feel coming off of a win?? And how lucky do you feel getting Buzzi when he has Tyreek Hill on a bye? The beautiful timing of the fantasy football schedule. Buzzi is going to be heading into this contest having lost two straight and has lost four of his last five. Jimmy is coming off a trampling of the league’s third highest scoring team entering the week. And he did so not even crossing 100 points.
  • Ronan, you are soon to have three quarterbacks on your roster? Dak Prescott, C.J. Stroud and…Kyler Murray. If only one of those quarterbacks can be flexed in. Ronan has Travis Kelce, D’Andre Swift, Raheem Mostert and the Eagles defense all on bye this week. He is going to be breaking into his lower ranks to try and win once again. Tom McLaughlin has to deal with Mahones resting, but he does get to play Baker Mayfield who has been more than okay the past two weeks. McLaughlin also will have to decide what to do with George Kittle. The man plays tight end, but Taysom Hill plays every position and can’t stop scoring. And with Ja’Marr Chase banged up it may get very interesting.
    • This is running it back from week two where Ronan earned his first win of the season over McLaughlin. CeeDee Lamb and Deebo Samuel each had over 19 points, and Rachaad White had one of his good weeks scoring 18.6 against the Bears. The only skill position player who did anything noteworthy for Tom was Mike Evans who scored 26.1 points that week.
  • Steve’s team is like a zombie. It just never seems to die. It doesn’t look like it is a killer, but once you are matched up against one, you are desperately trying to cut off its head. Luckily this week for Lobo, the head is already severed because the Philadelphia Eagles are on a bye and that means Jalen Hurts is not playing. And with the Rams also taking a rest in week 10, that means Steve doesn’t have a QB on his roster at the moment.
    • The last team to defeat Steve? Mr. Lobo, back in week one. Lobo took that contest 121.66 to 105.1 using a rare good game from Deshaun Watson as his main flotation device. Steve did ont have any player score more than 14.1 points in week one. He has not had that problem since.
  • Ritz and McGinnity matchup this week, the same week as a facebook memory commemorating their radio show pops up. Now I don’t think these two men are going to be screaming obscenities into a microphone, but their unique wordsmithing talents can be festered in texting jabs. Ritz gets Travis Etienne Jr. back from the bye, and now he has a choice to make between Will Levis or Bryce Young. McGinnity can insert Christian McCaffrey and Amon-Ra St. Brown back into his lineup, spelling Justice Hill and Wan’Dale Robinson…most likely. Who will McGinnity get to replace Dallas Goedert at tight end?
    • McGinnity and Ritz played each other in week two of the regular season and it was the Connecticut native who came away with the 138.36 – 127.26 victory. Solid outings from both teams. That week Ritz had a monster game from the now deceased (fantasy wise) Kirk Cousins and the somehow still reliable Keenan Allen. This is also when Bijan Robinson would still get the ball for the Falcons.

TEAMS ON A BYE: Kanas City Chiefs, Los Angeles Rams, Miami Dolphins, Philadelphia Eagles

STANDINGS

  • Steve now has a two-game lead over McGinnity as the league’s top team. Barring a crazy series of events, Steve seems in line to take the Regular Season Championship.
  • Ronan jumped up from sixth place last week to fourth place after his win over Tommy Simon.
    • Tommy Simon stays in third place despite the loss to Ronan. Don’t quite understand how T-Si is ahead of Ronan if Ronan has head-to-head.
      • Perhaps it is because T-Si has LITERALLY just 0.50 points more than Ronan this season. They are in a dead heat.
  • McLaughlin, Buzzi, Ritz and Lobo are all one game outside the playoff picture.
    • Interestingly enough, or perhaps not interesting at all, none of these teams play each other this week.
  • When you look at the final standings projections…all of the top four teams on draft day have red plummeting their season projections. It is nuts. Meanwhile McGinnity ranked 10th on draft day and has had the biggest jump to second.

PUBLIC RELATIONS

“Hope. It is the quintessential human delusion, simultaneously the source of your greatest strength and your greatest weakness.” – The Architect.

Jonathan Stanko – Manager of Watson The Other Side Of The Door

“I haven’t lost since the Rodgers administration. Which is fitting because like the jets, I don’t have a QB this week.”

Steve Kultzow – Manager of The Great Warren

“”Let’s go! The team knew this was a big rivalry game against coach Simon and they showed up! Results across the board this week were perfect actually. Got some tough decisions to make a starting QB, CJ coming off a record game, Dak playing great, fields and Kyler both coming back from injury.”

Ronan McClorey – Manager of Now You CeeDee, Now You Don’t

“Good to get back into the win column after some rough weeks. Obviously hopeful we can get Montgomery back in the mix soon. We look forward to being spoilers over the next few weeks.”

Jimmy Simon – Manager of Jakobi And Meyers Law Offices

“Every game is a must win. Guys in the locker room understand it. We’re banged up, but we’re not gonna fold easily. This week was a great step in where we want to be at the end of the season.”

“Eat shit, Tom.”

Mike Ritz – Manager of Dirty Mike And the Boys

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