Standings


Notable Week twelve & Season Nuggets
  • Here we are. One week away from the playoffs. We have two locked into the playoffs and into their respective seedings. One who is all but in barring a calamitous collapse, and then a final spot that has a needle through the hole, but is not entirely sewn up yet.
    • I get more into the playoff stuff a bit lower in this recap, so bare with me.
  • Some teams bit the bullet this week; RIP to a great season and close finishes that came just a bit too late.
  • There are two matchups in week 13 that mean absolutely nothing at all. They will be shortchanged in the recap next week, and for that I apologize in advance.
  • Tom McLaughlin has won his last two matchups by 84.99 points. His point differential this season, which was already the best, improves to 519.9 points. McLaughlin is averaging beating his opponents by 43.325 points this season. Utter domination.
  • Our average margin of victory is nearly 30 points per game this season. While there is an appropriate amount of parity in the league, like it is not egregious…but damn we don’t like having drama in the REEEEEEM.
  • This is just a random thought. What if we got rid of kickers and rather combined the kicking points to a team’s defensive/special teams? It would make them a higher scorer every week, and also change the theories on drafting a bit as well. You can have a great offensive team but a dismal defensive team so lots of points for the kicker but none for the defense. Just a thought. Typing into the void here.
  • Margin Of Victory By Week:
    • Week 1: 35.156
    • Week 2: 16.284
    • Week 3: 23.216
    • Week 4: 35.84
    • Week 5: 35.748
    • Week 6: 12.756
    • Week 7: 23.792
    • Week 8: 37.552
    • Week 9: 34.488
    • Week 10: 23.484
    • Week 11: 47.44
    • Week 12: 28.02
    • Average Margin Of Victory This Season Is 29.481
  • The coveted 160+ threshold does not get any new members this week.
    • Ronan has the highest scoring week of the season, but otherwise this is the Tom McLaughlin and Matthew Buzzi show as each have three games with over 160 points.
      • Ronan McClorey 174.12 (Week 8)
      • Matthew Buzzi 173.52 (Week 5)
      • Tom McLaughlin 173.22 (Week 1)
      • Tom McLaughlin 173.02 (Week 11)
      • Matthew Buzzi 172.7 Week 4)
      • Tom McLaughlin 162.74 (Week 8)
      • Matthew Buzzi 160.54 (Week 11)
  • Budget summary for those curious.
    • Ritz: $100 FAB left
    • McGinnity: $96 FAB left
    • Ronan: $82 FAB left
    • Steve: $75 FAB lef
    • Jimmy: $69 FAB left
    • Tommy: $68 FAB left
    • Tom: $68 FAB left
    • Lobo: $54 FAB lef
    • Buzzi: $42 FAB left
    • Stanko: $7 FAB left
  • Teams On A Bye: Arizona Cardinals, Carolina Panthers
    • Key Players On A Bye: DeAndre Hopkins, James Connor, Kyler Murray
  • Postseason Situation For Each Team
    • Tom McLaughlin has locked in the number one seed. He is the best of the bunch, and he will have the crown of expectations as the number one team and best team throughout the season.
    • Matthew Buzzi is locked into the two seed. Buzzi relies heavily on the Los Angeles Chargers which is a fickle ledge to stand upon. Matthew Buzzi will either be facing Tommy Simon who is currently in the three seed, or Ronan if he wins and Tommy loses (most likely).
    • Tommy Simon has just been a steady Eddy., Only one losing streak of more than one game this season, and he has something under his belt that most don’t; a win over Tommy McLaughlin.
    • Ronan is in the driver’s seat for the final playoff spot. He has scored the third most points in the league despite his 6-6 record, so any tiebreaker scenario, he is in really good shape.
    • I am in really shitty shape. I need to win and Ronan needs to lose. It is as simple as that. Stanko is unlikely to be competing for a three-peat.
    • Lobo kinda sneaky made himself a contender, all be it a long shot. He needs to win, and have both Ronan and I lose. If there is a tiebreaker, then he is shit out of luck because he is substantially behind in terms of total points scored. Lobo also goes W-L alternating pretty effectively, and after the win in week 12…he is due for a loss.
    • Jimmy has the toughest road. Sitting a game below .500, he needs to get to 6-7, hope that Ronan, Lobo and I all fall to 6-7, and he needs to somehow score more than 81 points than Ronan scores. This is the classic “So you are saying there’s a chance” bit.
    • Steve…is just in limbo. He has nothing to play for expect pure pride. He technically has the same proposition as Jimmy…but he needs to outscore Ronan by about 100.
    • McGinnity is sitting just above last place, and he is seems to be fine to avoid the utter gutter as long as he fills out a lineup. He has 33.54 points ahead of Ritz, so if Ritz wins and McGinnity loses, the Ritz has to outscore Matt by that much. Crazier things has happened, but…it is unlikely.
    • See above. Ritz needs a bit of a miracle to avoid paying double.
Average Team Totals Per Week
  • Week One: 113.47
  • Week Two: 121.29
  • Week Three: 103.11 (Least)
  • Week Four: 123.08
  • Week Five: 121.19
  • Week Six: 103.326 (First Week Of Byes)
  • Week Seven: 110.51
  • Week Eight: 126.35 (Most)
  • Week Nine: 120.08
  • Week Ten: 110.92
  • Week Eleven: 108.56
  • Week Twelve: 115.09
Points Scored Compared To Projected Through Week Twelve
  1. My Glockz Out (+124.26)
  2. Ek’s Gonna Give It To Ya (+44.53)
  3. Hotel, Motel, Golladay Inn (+36.5)
  4. My Own Worst Etiennemy (+11.58)
  5. Lights, Kamara, Jackson (+31.34)
  6. Country Roads Take Mahomes (-23.5)
  7. The Bourne Supremacy (-34.31)
  8. Ooooo Jeudy James Jeudy (-67.72)
  9. Dirty Mike And The Boys (-161.44)
  10. Keke, Coutee Luv Me (-192.04)

Week Twelve Matchup Recaps

My Own Worst Etiennemy (131.82) vs. The Bourne Supremacy (122.5)

What a day Sunday must have been for Steve Kultzow. He got to watch Mike White resurrect his hall of fame career and lead the New York Jets to a win over Chicago. He also got to watch himself get revenge on me for watching the New England Patriots take down his gang green in person last week.

Nothing is sweeter than sweet revenge, and this dessert for Steve involved putting my playoff hopes on a dangling thread that is slowly being untwined by a malicious curly mustached carnival man.

I had a chance going into Sunday night. I had a 103.5-102 lead with two games to go. I had Allen Lazard and Michael Pittman, and he had Jalen Hurts.

In the end, it wasn’t very close.

Jalen Hurts went off in the first quarter on Sunday, and I knew I was royally fucked. He had fifty yards rushing in the first five minutes. It was a recipe for disaster. He ended the day with 157 rushing yards. He only had 153 passing yards. I mean, he didn’t need to throw much because the Eagles ran for a season-high 363 yards.

All that meant was that I could go to bed early on Sunday. And that my fantasy season was over.

Jalen Hurts is not the MVP of this matchup. It is New York Jet wide receiver Garrett Wilson. You get the MVP title when you score two touchdowns and help your favorite team get to a real life win and a fantasy win. 23.9 points for Wilson, and none of them came from Wilson throwing. It is his second 20+ point game this season, with the other coming in week two against the Cleveland Browns.

For myself, you have to look at the running back position. I had Rhamondre Stevenson who had I had to play on Thanksgiving. Needed more investment to watch, and he did well with 15.7 points. I also played Ezekiel Elliot, who scored 16 points on Thursday, which is not something to snoot at. Lastly I chose to play Jeff Wilson Jr. because he was going up against the shitty Houston Texan defense. I did not expect Jeff Wilson Jr. to get hurt, miss two quarters, and then for the Dolphins to sit their starters for the last 20 minutes. He scored 11.7 points. Meanwhile I have Samaje Perine on my bench with 17.3 points, Brian Robinson with 19.5 points, and Rashaad White with 15.4 points.

Just tough. If I sub out some players and play with the puzzle pieces now, I could have strung it together. But that is hindsight.

*note to self, I didn’t type about how Justin Fields and Ja’Marr Chase both were ruled out Sunday morning and that really made me unhappy until right now*

I am fighting for dear life at 6-6 and Steve successfully played spoiler to imprive to 4-7.

Keke, Coutee, Luv Me (115.32) defeats Dirty Mike And The Boys (83.74)

Ritz knew he was in trouble when he checked the scoreboard after Thursday night’s games. Dak Prescott, who was up against Ritz’s New York Giants, scored only 14.84 points. Not the best point total, but Stefon Diggs had 17.7 points in the opening Turkey game against Detroit. Diggs and Dak cancelling each other out, so we turn to Dalvin Cook?

All the cooks were in the kitchen that day because Dalvin scored just 7.6 against the Patriots on Sunday night, putting Ritz on the defensive.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the matchup Lobo was not only drooling over the food spread, but also Josh Allen’s 29.92 point total. Add in the MIchael Gallup 8.8 point game, which is his second-best of the season, and Lobo is ecstatic. (We can ignore his decision to play the New York Giants defense against the Cowboys and them scoring zero points)

Come the rest of week 12, Lobo’s faint playoff hopes stayed afloat with strong performances from Foster Moreau with 10.8 points, and 17.4 points from Aaron Jones. Jonathan Taylor scored 17.3 points on Monday night for extra icing on the cake, even if it was just padding.

Ritz’s team struggled this season, but if this was a dynasty draft, then he would be in a great position for the future.

Just noticing a couple things on Lobo’s bench this week. Kyle Pitts is still on his bench and not dropped even thought his season is over. Also he had Trever Lawrence on his bench this week with 24.94 points, and also Chris Godwin with 23.0 points.

The MVP contest is going to be Josh Allen. It isn’t flashy, but most points in a week where no one else impressed grants him that title. I would be lying if I said that I also didn’t wanna use this MVP moniker to see if Allen will not be superhuman against the Patriots on Thursday.

Ritz falls down to 3-9 and Lobo keeps himself alive at 6-6.

My Glockz Out (133.38) defeats 00000 Jeudy James Jeudy (54.4)

McGinnity hung up the cleats. Sure he could have checked his roster over Thanksgiving weekend, but he decided to keep his comfy slippers on and not worry about a god damn think. And you know what? Good for him.

Well not really, I would like people set their lineups every week for accountability sake, but I do know that life gets in the way.

Regardless, this is one of, if not the largest margin of victory this season. 78.98 points. Good lord almighty. 78.98 points. But the most hilarious part is that it was nothing compared to My Glockz Out’s 91 point victory last week. The season’s best team is on an absolute tear right now. he is the run-away number one seed, and rightfully so.

Addressing the drastic nature of this throttling, we have to point to Matt playing Raheem Mostert and Leonard Fournette, both of whom were inactive for their respective teams. I understand that Matt didn’t have anything on his bench…but there is waiver wire and free agents. He has only spend four dollars in FAB. Could have picked up somebody or something. It would have helped him in the battle to not finish last and pay double come end of the season.

But for Tom, all things are still tracking well. Justin Jefferson was absolutely dynamite on Thursday night against New England. He had a touchdown in the first quarter and then didn’t stop, scoring 24.84 points. Kyler Murray did his fantasy thing while losing, which he does really well. Murray had 25.24 points, which is his third highest point total of the season.

Tom’s day could have been even better if Tony Pollard didn’t have his worst game in weeks. Only 7.1 points for the Dallas running back, his first single-digit outing since week six. Tom also played Tyler Higbee with a back-up quarterback for Los Angeles instead of Hayden Hurst of the Cincinnati Bengals. These are the little things that can make huge difference in the playoffs.

But you know what else is huge? Defenses that come to play, and that is what the Miami defense did against the Houston Texans. 20 points from the Dolphins, aided by a defensive touchdown. Their defensive score could have been ever better if the coaching staff didn’t pull all the starters in the third quarter. Miami defense/special teams get the MVP nod from me.

Tom ho-hums his way to 1-0 and McGinnity is at 4-8.

Ek’s Gonna Give It To Ya (117.76) defeats Hotel, motel, Golladay (108.6)

What we have here folks, is a playoff preview. Buzzi and Tommy are more than likely going to be matching up in the semifinals. This was a feeling out match.

For the victorious team, his version of thunder and lighting helped spark a big win. Justin Herbert and Austin Ekeler combined for 48.26 points. Pretty solid outing for the two. It was a relatively sloppy football game against Arizona, but Buzzi does not care.

Besides that, these two teams matched up evenly. No crazy performances from Tommy’s squad; his highest scorer was Nick Chubb with 19.7 points. Tommy may write to Christian McCaffrey’s parents to ask how their son is doing health wise and give him a little pep talk to play better.

Since McCaffrey joined the 49ers, he is averaging 16.03 points per game. Pretty good right? Take out his 36.26 point game against the Rams and he is averaging just under 11 points per game. One could say that Christian is ready to rise again, but he has to have healthy knees for that.

The biggest discrepancy in terms of positional matchup comes in the tight end position. Travis Kelce had somewhat of a pedestrian 13.7 points, but it was still substantially better than Greg Dulcich’s 2.1 points.

Is anyone on the Denver Broncos offense fantasy playable? I have no idea man. They stink.

The MVP is Herbert. This is the Herbert that Buzzi expected the entire season. His 28.76 point total is his season-high, and it is his first 20+ point fantasy game since week four against Houston. Right place at the right time for Buzzi. Now Buzzi is just hoping Herbert kept some ammo for the playoffs.

The result gives Buzzi and Tommy a week to strategize before playing each other again.

Lights, Kamara, Jackson (147.26) defeats Country Roads Take Mahomes (136.2)

You have to feel for Jimmy. You put up 136.2 points and you expect to win.

However, Jimmy was matched up with this week’s highest scorer…Mr. Ronan McClorey.

Ronan was fighting for his playoff life and needed a win in week 12. And that he got. His team came up huge, and he really has one man to thank for it.

Josh Jacobs. Las Vegas Raiders. Number one fantasy running back. Week 12 MVP.

45.3 points. He ran the ball 33 times against the Seattle Seahawks and had 229 yards and two touchdowns…none bigger than the 80 yard touchdown to win the game in overtime. That is 14 fantasy points. He only beat Jimmy by 11.06.

Jimmy, this is where you have permission to scream until your lungs give out.

Ronan needed everything he needed from Jacobs because his other running back Alvin Kamara score just 4.0 points and borderlines on bench warmer. Yowzers.

Alright, Jimmy. Have you recovered your breath yet? You had a damn good week. You even made things interesting on Sunday night! And imagine if Najee Harris didn’t get hurt on Monday night…

Miles Sanders scored 29.5 points on Sunday against the Green Bay Packers. That makes up for his 5.4 and 5.3 point performances in weeks 10 and 11. Right?That is a damn good game! He had a career high 143 rushing yards! You can’t be angry at that!

Also Najee Harris, he scored a touchdown for a second straight game! He got hurt and needed to rest in the second half. Totally understandable. Can’t be risking that abdomen. He gave you his second back-to-back double-digit scoring effort of the season!

Ronan’s huge week gets his to 6-6, and sinks Jimmy to 5-7.

Week 13 Matchups

  • Ek’s Gonna Give It To Ya (8-4) vs. The Bourne Supremacy (6-6)
  • Ooooo Jeudy James Jeudy (4-8) vs. My Own Worst Etiennemy (5-7)
  • Hotel, Motel, Golladay Inn (7-5) vs. Keke, Coutee Luve Me (6-6)
  • Dirty Mike And The Boys (3-9) vs. Lights, Kamara, Jackson (6-6)
  • My Glockz Out (10-2) vs. Country Roads Take Mahomes (5-7)

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